Tom Ford was recently described in AnOther magazine as a “fashion powerhouse, film mogul and old school romantic.” The first two are well known: Ford was a star for Gucci before creating his own fashion line, and his recent directorial debut in A Single Man was well received, garnering plenty of recognition at the Golden Globes and Oscars. To add to the list, apparently he’s an old school romantic to boot. I’m not sure precisely how one garners this ‘old school romantic’ label, but his recent lists of “Tom Ford's five easy lessons in how to be a modern gentleman” and “The Essentials,” the latter a list of 22 must-have’s/must-do’s for men, have certainly made a tangible case for where men are lacking.
In this two-part series, Tom Ford’s lists for what it takes to be a modern gentleman will be looked at again. Some parts work, whereas others don’t. Today, we examine Mr. Ford’s teachings for modern gentlemen, and at the same time we will critique and simplify.
Tom Ford’s Five Easy Lessons in How to be a Modern Gentleman
(with counter-points)
1. You should put on the best version of yourself when you go out in the world because that is a show of respect to the other people around you.
Basically be respectful of others. We can’t always be at our best, but don’t be a jerk to others. That’s all you really have to do.
2. A gentleman today has to work. People who do not work are so boring and are usually bored. You have to be passionate, you have to be engaged and you have to be contributing to the world.
Gentlemen have to work. Non-gentlemen have to work. Women have to work. Pretty much everyone has to work. It’s what people do to put food on the table. A gentleman can fall on hard times too and find himself temporarily unemployed. Those who are struggling to find work are not necessarily boring; perhaps circumstances are outside of their control. Calling them ‘boring’ is just mean and calling others ‘boring’ is not gentleman-like, Mr. Ford.
3. Manners are very important and actually knowing when things are appropriate. I always open doors for women, I carry their coat, I make sure that they're walking on the inside of the street. Stand up when people arrive at and leave the dinner table.
Go one step further. Hold the door open for anyone who is walking behind you, man or woman. Show respect for every guest that arrives at or leaves the dinner table. Don’t be sexist; it’s Tom Ford’s next point.
4. Don't be pretentious or racist or sexist or judge people by their background.
This is not something that should not be held exclusive to modern gentleman. No one should be prejudice. Period.
5. A man should never wear shorts in the city. Flip-flops and shorts in the city are never appropriate. Shorts should only be worn on the tennis court or on the beach.
But what if it’s really hot out? I mean really hot. To borrow a term from Jackie Moon, what if it’s rainforest sweaty? Sweating in full-length pants is hardly the most comfortable way for all men to live on a hot summer’s day. Instead, a man should focus on wearing what is ‘weather appropriate.’
Would you say this isn’t a gentleman for wearing shorts or sandals in Hawaii? On occasion, they can look good and be practical. Besides, this 'non-gentleman' did go on to be President.
Our Part II will examine Tom Ford’s list of 22 ‘must-have/must-do’ items for men. The Essentials is what he calls them. Here is that list:
Is it realistic? Does every gentleman have to have the funds to afford such luxury items? Why not make a list of The Essentials for the common modern gentleman? Come back next Monday, as there are plenty of changes to be made.
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