Movie Watchers I Know - Part IV (My Fatal Flaw)

In our final instalment of Movie Watchers I Know, I follow some biblical advice: Judge not lest ye be judged.

Parts I through III involved discussion over the many traits of movie watchers, but it in theatres or at home, many of them being pet peeves of mine. At the end of each introduction, I freely asked readers to admit if they belonged to any category. In order to avoid any hypocrisy, it is only fair that I too admit to any movie characteristics I might show.

Be sure to read Parts I through III before casting your judgment on me.

Part I: In Theatres (Pre-Movie).

Part II: In Theatres (During the Movie).

Part III: At Home.

Now it's time to admit to my fatal flaw.

How can one have only one movie watching flaw? Sometimes I feel bad for friends and family members of mine that watch movies with me, but I do love watching movies with others. I’m just glad my friends can overlook the many flaws I have when watching movies with them.

Here are a few:

In Theatres

I rarely want to see the movie that you want to see. I always want to see that obscure foreign film no one has heard about.

The Battle for the Armrest

I steal the armrests on both sides and never give them up.

If you are sitting behind me and annoying me, I sit up straight and tall so that I can obscure your view.

I turn and tell you to be quiet during movies, whether you are a friend or stranger.

 I refuse to help you catch up on key plot points if you just weren’t paying attention.

Even if we split the cost of a bag of popcorn 50/50, I’m going to eat more than half.

I insist on staying until all the credits are done, even if I’m positive there are no teasers after the credits are finished.

If you pick a movie and it sucks, I blame it on your poor taste in movies. If I pick a movie and it sucks, the critics are the ones with poor taste.

At Home

I insist on the lights being off for real movie atmosphere.

The movie must be played in Widescreen. Movies played in Full Screen don’t give the full effect.

I hate it when people ask for explanations of plot points that have not yet been explained. “Why did that guy backstab his friend?” If you don’t know, likely I don’t know because the answer hasn’t come yet. Just be patient and wait for the story to answer everything for you.

I only care about the Blooper Reel when looking at Bonus Material. I have no interest in any other special features, especially the boring ‘Making of’ that people find so interesting.

Well...
That’s all I can think of for now.

And this concludes our four-part series. If anybody wants to go watch a movie tonight, let me know.

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