Movie Watchers I Know - Part I

Although watching a movie would typically be seen as a solitary activity, in order to have a good discussion of the plot or meaning of certain movies, or even to be ‘in’ on the joke for comedies, watching movies with others increases the socializing benefits of movies once they are done. I am an avid movie watcher, be it in theatres or at home, but sometimes it is difficult to watch movies with others. In theatres, friends are always asking you plot related questions during important times of the movie. At home, movie watching can be difficult too. There’s the constant ‘pause to run for a snack’ guy or the “rewind that, I didn’t understand what he said” guy. Odds are you belong to one of these categories, whether you are willing to admit to it or not. And if you truly are outside these categories, you surely know plenty of friends who fall within these parameters.

The next few weeks will include a list of types of movie watchers I know, but keep in mind that this list not exhaustive. In fact, the variety of types is so widespread that I have filtered these people into three different categories: In Theatres (Pre-Movie), In Theatres (During the movie), and At Home.

Which group do you belong to? Don't be shy and proudly admit to one if you do. Also feel free to add any other types of movie watchers you yourself know. Let us begin with Part I: In Theatres (Pre-Movie).

In Theatres (Pre-Movie)

The Excessive Seat-Saver

Ever gone to a movie on opening weekend? The theatre is constantly packed and prime seating is a serious luxury. No one wants to watch the new Batman in 3-D from the front row. So what’s the solution? Find a friend who’s willing to wear multiple layers of clothing and wait in line hours before the movie starts. Once inside the theatre, he (it’s always a ‘he’) will take off his two jackets, hoodie and sweater to drape them all across as many seats as possible. For his friends, it’s an absolute necessity to sit as a group, even if some find themselves eight seats apart, to enjoy the movie to its fullest. It’s as though they think that if their friends were forced to sit anywhere else in the theatre, they would not see the same movie on the screen. Subsequently, those who were actually tenth in movie line are now relegated to seats on the sides or up front because the best 50 seats in the theatre have already been reserved by the first nine customers.

The Trailer Chit-Chatter

The rare movie watcher may not realize how many people actually enjoy the trailers. While the movie previews are running and regular movie goers are judging them to see if the upcoming films are worth their money, The Trailer Chit-Chatter is talking (loudly) to their friend about how their children are doing the darndest things or how their cell phone plan saves them on roaming calls. Those in close proximity are wondering why these poignant conversation topics could not have come up before the previews started. The Chit-Chatter must realize one thing: once the lights go down and the automobile and soda commercials have gone by, it is time to be quiet. When the screen goes green and says: “This preview has been approved for all audiences,” that is your cue. Silence s’il te plait.

The Trailer Analyser

The Analyser is the exact opposite of the Chit-Chatter. This person is the one who uses the previews as the optimal time to show off his or her movie knowledge, while it’s still not taboo to talk aloud. Whatever trailer comes on screen, the analyser is ready to tell friends about the director’s entire filmography or what training the main actor went through for the upcoming role. Explanations will typically be slightly louder than ones regular talking voice in case there are any people close by who might be impressed by their immense film research.

The Speedy Popcorn-Eater for the Free Refill

By far the funniest member of the group, this guy (again, always a guy) needs some snack foods for the movie and realizes that all the prices are rip-offs. He decides upon the large popcorn, partly because of his ability to share with others, but also because the large is always the only size offering a free refill. Once he takes his seat in the theater, he quickly realizes that he’s not going to want to leave for a refill once the movie has started. Now, in order to get his money’s worth, he must scarf down the popcorn to get his refill before the movie actually begins. He’s constantly passing the bag down to friends, telling them to hurry up and take as much as possible. And wouldn’t you know it, he’s always too sick to have two bites of the second bag after all his diligent work.

Be sure to read Parts I through IV.

aa.

Part II: In Theatres (During the Movie) – come back next Monday.

Part III: At Home – to be released December 27th.

Part IV: My Fatal Flaw –coming the first Monday of 2011.