Hutchins, Hutchins & Sons

Baby Food Confusion

2011-09-03T03:00:00.005-04:00

Misunderstandings happen all the time. This is the story of something that happened to a friend of mine. We were on a flight to Germany when we saw that a mother turned down the airline baby food for her child because she had her own food for the baby girl. My friend mentioned how she wouldn’t mind taking the baby food if the flight attendants were just going to throw it out since it was unwanted. This occurrence led to her telling me a hilarious story about what happened to her in the grocery not too long before, a story about buying baby food. Again, this is my recollection of her story, so any inconsistencies or exaggerations are entirely of my own fault. Here is her story - let’s call her M.

M doesn’t have a child, but she loves the taste of baby food. To her, it tastes like a better kind of apple sauce. Baby food is, thus, not an uncommon purchase for her at the grocery. A few months ago, she was buying some snacks and frivolous items, and decided to put some baby food in her cart. When she got to the cash register, she realized she had only $25 in cash on her, and her debit/credit cards were forgotten at home. She forewarned the cash lady of her situation as the items are being scanned:

“I only have $25 on me, so let me know when the total hits $20. That way I can decide what items to take out.”

The lady at the register scans the items as they come by: bread, cola, freezies, baby food, chips – slowly the total reaches $20. The cashier gives her the head up and M looks at the many items not yet scanned, most noticeably the latest copy of Elle magazine. M decides to make that her final $5, but the magazine puts her over the limit.

“How much am I over the $25 by?” asks M.

“Just a dollar and seventeen cents,” responds the cashier.

“Okay... then let’s add the magazine and just take out the baby food.”

The cashier looks M straight in the eye: “YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!”

Not understanding the situation from the outsider’s point of view, M insists on her magazine and that the baby food is not as important as her fashion fix. Only when she walks out the store does M realize what the cashier perceived: that the baby can starve while she gets her fill of girly magazines, chips and pop.

The moral of the story is for all the cashiers out there: judge not unless you know the whole story – and remember that adults like to eat baby food too sometimes.

Song of the Week - Alison Krauss

2011-09-02T03:00:00.000-04:00

Alison Krauss & Union Station - Paper Airplane
Album: Paper Airplane

At the age of 40, Alison Krauss already has the most Grammy's wins of any female artist with 26. That puts her well ahead of Aretha Franklin (20 Grammy's) and 3rd on the all-time list. Only Qunicy Jones, with 27 Grammy wins, and Georg Solti, with 31 wins, are in her path to becoming the most decorated Grammy-winning singer in history. Considering her last album, Raising Sand, won her five Grammy's, it is really only a matter of time before she makes history, again.

Her latest album, Paper Airplane, flows more into a bluegrass feel instead of contemporary country. The songs are melancholic and heartfelt, the title track beautifully written by songwriter Robert Lee Castleman.

Country music may not be for everyone, but Krauss' beautiful voice and the success derived from her music cannot be ignored by anyone.

Boxing: Where Everyone Can Be a Champion

2011-09-01T03:00:00.000-04:00

Professional boxing is the one major sport without an established league. Household acronyms need no introduction to what sports leagues they represent: NHL, NFL, NBA, MLB, UFC. There’s no confusion over who the best is in each sport because we have one champion in each. Then there’s boxing – WBA, WBC, WBO, IBF, IBO. How can boxing have 5 different champions (or more if we count titles from individual countries or continents) at any weight division? It’s because there is no single recognized league for boxing fans or fighters to look to as the one true league. And with the millions of dollars at stake with licensing fees, no league is willing to amalgamate for the sake of boxing if it costs them even the tiniest cut of financial income. At this point, it’s up to Ring Magazine to be the voice of who the recognized champion should be. However, one has to take these rankings with a critical eye, as the magazine’s owner, boxing legend Oscar De La Hoya, is also a major player in promoting boxers with Golden Boy Promotions. Though he has promised not to influence the editorial content, there clearly is a conflict of interest between ownership and journalistic independence.

Povetkin (left) is the WBA Heavyweight Champion, while Klistschko (right) is the WBA 'Super'-Champion

The major leagues aren’t doing themselves any favours either. It is widely recognized that Wladimir Klitschko is the undisputed heavyweight champion of the world. He has defeated every major challenger - with relative ease. When David Haye won the WBA Heavyweight Championship over Nicolai Valuev, everyone knew he wasn’t the real top heavyweight. When Haye finally stepped up to the challenge of Klitschko, he was embarrassed and ridiculed for his scared tactics. While Klistschko added the WBA belt to his already full wardrobe less than two months ago, it wasn’t long that we found out Ruslan Chagaev (who was brutally beaten up by Klitschko not so long ago) and Alexander Povetkin (who had signed to fight Klitschko but backed out of the fight at his trainer’s discretion, fearing Povetkin was not ready to fight the champion) were fighting for the same WBA Championship belt this past weekend. How is this possible? The WBA decided to elevate Klitschko’s status to ‘Super-Champion’, while Povetkin’s victory earned him the distinction of WBA Heavyweight Champion. The reason it sounds so silly is because it is.

Boxing is quickly losing interest not only in America but around the world, and there are many reasons why. While some blame it on the lack of major American talent, it’s tough to find that true when the two biggest draws in UFC mixed martial arts are Brazilian (Anderson Silva) and Canadian (Georges St. Pierre). The rise of the UFC in popularity may also be partially to blame for the decreased interest in boxing fans for the younger generations. The real reason the sport may be falling is because there are too many interest groups fighting for an increasingly smaller amount of money invested by fans into the sport. For the sake of the future of boxing, presidents from all the boxing associations and fans alike should demand the unification of the leagues so that there is only one true champion at each weight class. The championship fights would generate a lot more interest as a result, and the fights amongst contenders would allow for what is best for the sport (instead of what is the best way to pad a certain boxer’s record to make him appear better than he really is). Fans don’t want to see unification title fights anymore; we just want one champion and a plethora of fighters looking to dethrone the man at the summit. For the sake of this dying sport, unifying the leagues needs to be done.

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The 100m Mistake

2011-08-30T15:00:00.003-04:00

Sprinting is all about milliseconds, but that doesn’t necessarily translate to records or podium finishes. This past weekend in Korea at the World Track and Field Championship, Usain Bolt, the world’s fastest man and biggest draw in track, was disqualified in the 100m finals after just one false start where he jumped out of the blocks a fraction before the gun. One mistake is all it takes to get disqualified under the new rules of the 100-meter sprint, and Bolt’s error cost those who spent hundreds of dollars to be in the stadium, as well as the countless people watching at home, a chance to witness greatness - all for the sake of television programming.

Usain Bolt exits early from the 100m finals

The idea for the ‘zero-tolerance’ with starts is partially due to the fact that TV executives didn’t like excessive false starts forcing their program to go over the allotted network time slot. Each false start forces the run-time to take an extra few minutes for the runners to get set back in the starting blocks. Imagine three or four false starts from different runners, and the program might run over the TV schedule by 10-15 minutes. The new rule forced the runners to be completely disciplined in their blocks for the penalty of disqualification is too great. After this weekend, we know see clearly that the penalty is too much.

The punishment doesn’t fit the crime. Imagine training for a lifetime for a moment at the World Championship – adrenaline is running high, nerves are higher, the stadium is packed, cameras are all focused on the start. Then, a little jump and everything that he has worked so hard for is gone in a heartbeat. Such a fate would be crushing for any runner, but the fact that it happened to Bolt is what crushed the hope of fans at the stadium and around the world.

Usain Bolt would have won the Gold medal. All his fellow runners had no doubt about that – only one runner finished in less than 10 seconds. What Bolt wanted to do was amaze us by running a new World Record time. Something the whole world would talk about, maybe forever. His own world record of 9.58(!) from 2009 would never be easy to beat, but he wanted to amaze us once more. Instead, after jumping the block a fraction of a second early, he was forced to watch from the sidelines.

Yohan Blake (9.92) is the 100m Champion

While the rule is equal in applying to all runners, it is not fair, and fans of the sport know it’s not right. How do you think Yohan Blake feels? Blake, a fellow Jamaican, won the Gold medal with a 9.92 time, but you’d be hard pressed to find anyone talking about him. Victory shouldn’t be this bittersweet.

The race lasts less than 10 seconds itself. The buildup doesn’t take more than a few minutes. The TV producers would do well to allot a few more minutes for the most exciting 10 seconds in sport, even at the cost of potential false starts increasing the run-time, for the sake of building up the tension, the excitement, and the chance for these athletes to amaze us.

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Song of the Week - Dashboard (again!)

2011-08-26T03:00:00.003-04:00

Dashboard Confessional - If I Needed You
(written by: Townes Van Zant)
Album: The Wire Tapes Vol. 1

The Wire Tapes Vol. 1 is the least known of Dashboard Confessional's discography. It was released only on his 2007 acoustic tour and then very briefly on his website. Featuring covers from notable artists such as Weezer, Counting Crows and Regina Spektor, one must ask why he didn't release this album to the broader market as there would clearly be an interest. My only hope is that there is a re-release at his next live performance, as the past two times I've seen him there was nothing happening.

Get it together Mr. Carrabba. I want this CD.

The News Never Stops

2011-08-22T03:00:00.008-04:00

“The news doesn’t stop on Mondays. Neither should your paper.”

This new advert from the Globe and Mail found on newsstands is a little jab at their national competitor, the National Post. The Post has decided again to opt out of printing Monday papers for the summer months to help out with their budgeting. I agree with the Globe that news doesn’t stop Mondays and newspapers should be in print every day to inform the public. I do, however, find it ironic that the Globe and Mail would make such a tongue-in-cheek remark when they themselves do not have a Sunday paper. And no, the “Weekend Edition” delivered on Saturdays does not accommodate all the Saturday news that would be fit to print on Sundays. Shouldn’t the advertising sector realize that the news doesn’t stop on Sundays either? Neither should their paper.

Neither the Globe and Mail nor the National Post deliver Sunday papers currently, and the fact that the Post is thinning down to a Tuesday-Saturday paper is quite troubling. It is more discouraging that not only did the Globe and Mail have to make a similar cut to their Sunday newspaper, but now instead of encouraging the promotion of news across all brands, they are hypocritically knocking down another paper that has fallen on tough times for following a cost-cutting strategy that they themselves have employed.

You don’t see the Toronto Star making cracks at the expense of the two leading national papers. What good would that do?

News doesn’t ever stop. Not any day. Not any hour. Not any minute. If the Globe is so interested in proclaiming that the newspaper shouldn’t stop any day, they should invest those advertising dollars into bringing back their Sunday paper.

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Song of the Week - Bromantic

2011-08-20T03:00:00.005-04:00

New Found Glory - Saints and Sailors
(written by: Dashboard Confessional)
Album: Swiss Army Bro-mance

On their recent tour together, New Found Glory and Dashboard Confessional co-released a Vinyl record featuring just four songs. New Found Glory covered two of Dashboard Confessionals tracks, and vice-versa. The result was the Swiss Army Bro-mance, a play on words from Dashboard's most popular album, Swiss Army Romance.

New Found Glory are not newcomers to punk remakes of other band's songs; they have two full length cove albums: From the Screen to Your Stereo (Parts I and II). These songs would be a welcome addition to Part III.

Pre-seaon Benchclearing

2011-08-19T03:00:00.001-04:00

It used to be what separated professionals from amateurs. It was what separated coaches from players. The recent soccer match between Barcelona and Real Madrid blurred the lines with their petty brawl and coaching scuffle. To its credit, it solidified a rivalry that has and will last for generations. Nonetheless, it was a disgrace for the sport.

Soccer is a gentleman’s game played by hooligans, or so the saying goes. While the hooligans are typically the fans, go to any amateur game in the city and ask any referee how often he refs a game that ends with punches, threats, or benches being cleared after a nasty tackle. The frequency will shock you. In fact, the lower the quality, the more fights occur it seems. This is why fans are so surprised at the brawl that took place this past Wednesday in Spain.

While Barcelona lifted the Supercopa trophy after a 5-4 aggregate win over rivals Real Madrid, both teams know that the whole event a pre-season tournament before the league starts up this weekend. Both teams are two of the richest and most successful clubs in the world, and both coaches have won every major trophy in their illustrious careers. In spite of all this, in the final minutes before the whistle blew to crown Barcelona the victors, Real Madrid’s Marcelo scissor tackled Barcelona newcomer Cesc Fabregas in a rather dirty display. Though Marcelo was shown the red card, the ensuing baseball-like bench clearing resulted in the pettiest of actions for Real Madrid’s coach, Jose Mourinho. Amidst the fracas, Mourinho casually walked up behind a Barcelona assistant coach, and appeared to poke him in the eye in an attempt to pull his ear or something similarly stupid (watch the video anddetermine for yourself). As he walked away, he was then pushed in the head by the opposing coach. While Mourninho walked away and laughed off the whole incident, he brought his team down to a level that fans deserve to dislike.

Coach Mourinho said the Supercopa is a “tiny little title” and essentially said that he didn’t care if his team lost the game. That’s easy to say after you lose, but the actions amid the mini-brawl did not represent an unimportant game, for him or the players. He then went on to claim some absurd tactic done by the Barcelona ballboys on the sidelines. He may sound like a sore loser for a man that has won everything; others may like his passion for winning. No matter what, the fighting has to stop.

The actions may lead to animosity off the field and Barcelona coach Pep Guardiola is fully aware of such implications: "We must be careful, because one day we will cause harm, not on the field but off, and we're all a little responsible for this."

Indeed we are. If recreational games are leading to fights on a regular basis, and the animosity between opposing fans, players, and coaches at the professional intensifies, how are we promoting ‘the beautiful game’ or a beautiful city?

Putting the 'Sex' into Energy Drinks

2011-08-17T03:00:00.006-04:00

Energy drinks have never been this sexy. In a crowded market vying for the late teens/early 20s market, sometimes the only way to get noticed is by sexing up the shelves. While energy drinks were initially to give people a boost to make through exhausting afternoons, the mixture of vodka with Red Bull won over the dancing crowd at clubs for their drink of choice. While Red Bull is clearly the front runner in terms of energy drink promotion (they even have an MLS soccer team named after their brand), recognition on store shelves may not be necessary wtih the shameless promotion of sexual energy drinks.

Check out Sexergy's TV Spot

It may sound silly, but two current drinks on the market go by the names Pimp Juice and Sexergy. It sounds too stupid to be true, but these drinks would sell based on the novelty of the name alone. I mean, wouldn’t you love to show up at a party and see the reactions of friends as you crack open a can of Pimp Juice? It’s so over-the-top that it’s too funny not to buy.

The energy drink Pimp Juice was introduced back in 2003 by rapper Nelly, coinciding with release of the music single of the same name, showcasing the promotion of energy drinks via celebrities (and the drink promoting the song at the same time). With lyrics like "she only want me for my pimp juice", it's tough to take Nelly at his word that 'pimp juice' is supposed to be his really nice car. The song itself was never a big hit, and it is rumoured that Pimp Juice energy drink has since been taken off the market, but the shameless production of selling sex is clear.

Sexergy is looking perhaps looking to take the void left by the disappearance of Pimp Juice. The can is sleek black with red, and the commercial is a carbon copy of the successful ad campaigns from Axe deodorant body spray. Drink this and all the good-looking women will automatically be drawn to you.

Sex sells, sex stirs up controversy, and sexy products stand out in the grocery. I don’t think Sexergy is banking on its taste or energy production to separate it from the competition. Why else would it's motto be: Get sexergised! What does this even mean? Well according to its website, "Get sexergised” means:

Let the tingling cherry taste of sexergy seduce you. And: with sexergy, you are always on the sexy side of life.

When in doubt, add the word ‘sex’ and the marketing process will take care of itself. At this rate, it won’t be long until we see bottled water with a sexy alter-ego. How about a bottled water called ‘Fountain of Sex’? Time to get that trademarked.

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Clogging Up Creativity

2011-08-15T03:00:00.008-04:00

We all know the statistics surrounding obesity. All over North America, people are just getting fatter. We have gym membership flyers in our mailbox every week, grocery stores filled with ‘low fat, low sodium’ options, and though we may adopt some of these healthy standards, we fail to abide by the obivious choices when it’s the most obvious. In Canada, we look at the Americans and see the world’s fattest nation; however, instead of realizing our own declining trend in food choices, we adopt some of their worst habits. Hypocrisy, thy name is you.

CNE's newest addition, the Krispy Kreme egg and bacon cheeseburger

The Canadian National Exhibition, also known as the CNE or the Ex, recently got a full front page picture for The Globe and Mail’s T.O. section for the latest addition to the food fair. The feature picture was of the brand new doughnut cheeseburger. Wait for it, it gets worse. The doughnuts, replacing the normal hamburger buns, will be from none other than Krispy Kreme, the unhealthiest doughnut of them all. Imagine this, two Krispy Kreme doughnuts sandwiching a cheeseburger, with the option of adding bacon and an egg. As disgusting as that may sound to some, others are surely salivating at the idea of having one. That doesn’t say much for our healthy choices.

While this idea may garner serious fandom for its creativity, one must really wonder how much thought truly went into this sweet-savoury dinner. It’s akin to something like the ‘Meat Machine,’ initially a satirical invention from TV comedian Tracy Morgan in the show 30 Rock. His idea was getting rid of bread and replacing it with two pieces of meat. Sure, it sounded over-the-top at first, but KFC soon came out with the ‘Double Down’, practically an exact replica of the Meat Machine idea using fried chicken as the bread.

The extreme high-calorie, high-fat food choice is nothing new when it comes to the CNE. Just last year, news got out of the new organ-clogging creation: deep-fried butter. As this treat has been a staple at fairs across the United States in recent years, it’s no wonder that they are having trouble fighting obesity.

Tracy Morgan's invention comes to life with KFC's Double Down

Creativity in food is at an all-time low in restaurants across the continent. Instead of presenting new ways of creating delicious foods that are healthy, companies and food creationists alike seems content with combining multiple unhealthy choices into a tantalizing dish that people will not be able to keep themselves from trying. Wendy’s seems intent on selling their ‘baconator’ burger, complete with six(!) strips of bacon, health be damned. Even Tim Horton’s, Canada’s biggest coffee chain that prides themselves on offering healthier options, has found an ever-growing number of their chains to be teaming up with Coldstone Creamery ice cream. Before this boom in creativity, deep-fried butter and doughnut burgers would have sounded insane to say the least. Now, they don’t even sound surprising.

If people are really interested in changing not only their own diet, but also the progression of food creationism in restaurants and at fairs, they must not dive into the temptation of deep-fried fat and sugar-soaked meats. Once the trend starts to change, we will see culinary chefs really create dishes that will both amaze us in taste and surprise us with ingredients. At our current pace, it’s no wonder that fair attendances are at an all-time low; it’s tough enough for their loyal supporters to muster up the energy to get out to them.

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Song of the Week - Gorillaz

2011-08-13T03:00:00.001-04:00

Gorillaz - Amarillo
Album: The Fall

It was over ten years ago when Gorillaz released their first hit "Clint Eastwood". Since then they have released three albums, won a Grammy (Feel Good Inc.), and all this despite having a group of constantly changing members. Damon Albarn, one of the founding members recorded their latest album, The Fall, solely on his iPad during their previous tour and the band then released it online for free last Christmas. That's worth a listen.

Women in Sport: Hot or Not

2011-08-12T03:00:00.036-04:00

Where do women in professional sports stand today? Are they taken seriously or are they merely to appease the interest of equal rights? For the most part, sports have mainly been a boys club. Almost every guy must keep up-to-date the world of pro athletes and their favorite teams; it’s almost an unwritten rule in some sort of ‘guy code’. As a result, the announcers are typically male (a combination of former star athletes and male play-by-play commentators), the owners and managers are all men, and the viewers are mostly men.

How is Danica Patrick seen as an athlete?

But what about the athletes – does their gender matter? It simple terms, yes. Men are bigger/faster/stronger and the consumer wants to see the best possible product. That all being said, this does not necessarily mean there is an aversion to women in sport. The past Women’s World Cup of Soccer drew record ratings for American television audiences. In Auto Racing, Danica Patrick is the prized athlete of IndyCar and soon to be NASCAR, circuits where she competes with the best drivers in the world regardless of gender. Canada women’s hockey at the Vancouver Olympic Games drew massive audiences in their pursuit of the gold medal. People are clearly willing to watch female athletes, but do our reasons differ as to why?

Bob McCown is Toronto’s biggest name in sports radio, and much of that is thanks to his often controversial comments – or, as he likes to put it, ‘telling it like it is’. This past March, McCown created a little stir about his views towards women’s sports (on International Women’s Day no less):

[Women's sport] is a topic we have addressed on this program and the essence, the entire essence of the conversation revolved, I thought, around the wrong thing. It’s not whether women’s sport is any good or not. The sole motivation for any man to watch women’s sport is: are they half naked? Are they good looking? Other than that, it don’t matter. I don’t care what the quality of competition is. I don’t care how good they are. I don’t care if it’s a World Championship or your next door neighbour. Guys are only interested in women’s sport if it’s good looking chicks.

McCown, after speaking about women’s inferiority to sports such as curling, went on to talk about volleyball:

And what is the compulsion with women’s volleyball? Have you actually watched women’s volleyball? I have never. I have never seen a women’s volleyball player that I would consider to be attractive. I’m not saying they’re all dogs… but it’s just not overwhelming, you know what I mean? Hockey you ain’t gonna watch cause you can’t see them. Soccer I’d never watch cause it’s soccer. And why would you watch an inferior product? You don’t get enough close-ups in soccer anyway to tell whether they’re attractive or not. And that is the essence for all men. End of topic, end of discussion. Give me an attractive woman playing a sport and I’ll watch it.

Even SI treated female athletes like sex symbols

As sad as it sounds, McCown might be speaking for a larger sports populace than we think. In Toronto, two sports leagues popped up for women’s football and basketball, but not the kind of league that promotes their athletic ability. First, we have the Lingerie Football League, whose concept and drawing power is right there in the title: women in lingerie playing football. The LFL got even more press time as the current Mayor of Toronto’s niece was trying out and succeeded in making the team. While this blog site is far from well-known, my earlier piece on the LFL got a noticeably greater amount of hits thanks to internet users looking up search titles akin to “women sports stripping”.

This past Tuesday, the Toronto Star had an article about the upcoming basketball league for women of Toronto, the BBE – Bikini Basketball Entertainment. The online tryout video featured less than stellar female athletes trying to run simple lay-ups. Though the basketball quality is terribly poor, comments from the likes of Bob McCown give the impression that men would rather spend the $7 to watch the BBE on Pay-Per-View than go out and watch quality women’s soccer live.

A women’s aesthetic appeal does matter in sports today. Danica Patrick is not even one of the top 10 drivers in the IRL, but you wouldn’t know that from all her commercials and apparel for sale at the events. But who’s to say that the same doesn’t go for men in some regards – see: David Beckham.

Men will always be the dominant voice in sport, but that’s just because men, on average, have a greater passion for it. And both men and women who are passionate about sports can see the skill of female athletes competing at the highest level, be that against men or other women. The idea that men would rather watch lower quality female athletes run around in skimpy-clad outfits than other women who are at the best in the world is insulting to both the men as consumers and the women who work so hard to be at the top or their sport. Those who would rather watch the Lingerie Football or Bikini Basketball aren’t real sports fans; they’re just kind of creepy.

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Betting on the Youth

2011-08-10T03:00:00.004-04:00

There comes the time in almost every young athlete’s life when he comes to the realization that there is someone else his age who is now playing pro. Typically it comes in someone’s late teens or early twenties when the next generation star player is born, and the casual athlete sees what only could have been: the money, the recognition, the fun. I remember getting ready to take the next step in my soccer career by playing Varsity soccer for my university. The same summer Lionel Messi, always two years younger than me, played his debut match for the first team of Barcelona in the Spanish League. He was the next Maradona, the next superstar, and he was still 16. Around the same time, every Canadian was looking at hockey’s next Great One: Sidney Crosby. Like Messi, Crosby was also born in 1987 and found himself as the Assistant Captain on the Pittsburgh Penguins his rookie season at age 16. Crosby has since won every major accolade (Stanley Cup, Olympic Gold Medal, NHL MVP) while Messi has won every single individual and European League award, missing only an Argentina World Cup victory to solidify his name as perhaps the greatest of all-time.

Leonel Angel Coira, age 7, might be Real Madrid's future

While news of these two being touted as the next great saviours to their respective sports, bruising the egos of high school and university athletes alike, recent news of Real Madrid signing Leonel Angel Coira might just make the grade two elementary school athletes cry. Leo (as he is called by his friends), you see, is seven years old.

At the age of seven, I was preparing myself for grade two. Athletically, it was my first year of competitive soccer. I was also playing Little League baseball and a plethora of other sports. I was a good athlete, but wouldn’t have made any professional coaches turn their heads. So how is it that this seven-year old gets signed to one of the richest clubs in soccer? The answer: Hope.

Lionel Messi started training with Barcelona at age 13, only to make his debut three years later. This early signing has been integral in Barcelona winning the Spanish League five times and the UEFA Champions League (the ultimate trophy for club soccer) three times in Messi’s seven years at the club. Despite Real Madrid breaking records in signing the best players to the most lucrative contracts, their rival team has Messi, and he beats them all. Real Madrid is turning the youth in hopes that they might pick up the next Messi and enjoy a decade of soccer supremacy.

Lionel Messi, age 13

Does the whole thing sound a little silly? Absolutely. Who knows how this kid will grow, how his work ethic will turn out, or whether this kid even ends up enjoying soccer by the time he turns nine? The reality for soccer clubs at the moment, however, is winning – at all costs. If they had known of Lionel Messi’s potential, rest assured teams would have tried to sign him while he was still in the womb and fans would already have jerseys with his name on the back.

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Song of the Week - A Dan Band Wedding

2011-08-06T15:00:00.013-04:00

The Dan Band - Total Eclipse of the Heart (from Old School)

Original song written by Bonnie Tyler

The Dan Band - Candy Shop (from The Hangover)
Original song written by 50 Cent

There's no better way to celebrate a wedding than with Dan Finnerty and The Dan band.
Though it may be mildly offensive.

Congratulations Lauren & Kyle!

The New Faces of Comics

2011-08-03T15:00:00.002-04:00

The world of comics is slowly changing into a more accurate representation of the real world. Comics used to be about entertainment through storytelling. Superheroes used to be about good versus evil. In today’s world, such simple notions no longer apply. The comic universe is growing with parallel universes, allowing character to be reinvented and redeveloped in infinite different ways, all the while not tampering with the original storyline.

Archie comics have always been about simple stories with a good message thrown in here or there. Decades after its first release, readers today could look back at Riverdale as a very Caucasian high school with the simple boy chases girl (or vice-versa) mentality – hardly representational of the real world today. Suddenly that has all changed with the addition of Kevin Keller and the character development of Valerie, the black back-up singer from Josie and the Pussycats.

As far as superheroes go, Spider-Man has been making minor headlines several times in the past few months. After Marvel announced his impending death in an upcoming comic, many fans were disinterested as superheroes die time and time again, only to be reincarnated in some way or another. This particular death was of less importance because Spider-Man has plenty of different comics for purchase with varying storylines, meaning his death in one comic universe would have zero impact on his presence elsewhere. Now Spider-Man has a new identity if Marvel’s brand new Ultimates comic world. With the storyline starting fresh, no longer is our hero Peter Parker, but rather he is Miles Morales, a half-black half-hispanic teenager.

Archie Comics made their biggest news splash last year with the development of the story where Archie gets married, and the debate ensued as to whether he should pick Betty or Veronica. It was soon revealed that Archie chose the spoiled, rich Veronica Lodge, but later the comics had a parallel storyline showing Archie marrying Betty. As the storyline was set in the future and was merely a hypothetical fantasy story arc, the never-aging high school Archie is now free to embark on a relationship with Valerie. This relationship has garnered significant exposure as it is the first interracial relationship in an Archie comic.

The introduction of Kevin Keller is also of significance, as he is the first openly gay student at Riverdale. While the students themselves in the fictional world don’t make such a big deal out of this revelation (outside of Veronica who found herself chasing him before he told her his sexual preference), much of the media has applauded the integration of a gay character into the everyday writing of the comics.

A gay comic character is nothing new, not even for a superhero. Writer Warren Ellis created the gay superhero Midnighter in the Stormwatch series. As an openly gay lead with a personality much akin to that of Batman, Midnighter goes on to marry Apollo, a more Superman-esque figure. These two heroes were created back in 1998 and are still feature players in the DC Comics universe today.

Midnighter does not belong to any stereotype.

In regards to the new Spider-Man, there have been many portrayals of African-Americans as superheroes, most notably Falcon and Nick Fury, but a mixed black-hispanic hero is most definitely a first on such a grand stage.

It is very important for a medium as grandiose and fictional as comic books to be a fair representation of the world the readers live in. Today’s society includes an ever-growing number of interracial relationships and children, as well as a growing number of people open about their sexuality. The addition of a Kevin Keller as a regular student at Riverdale High School does help mark the acceptance of homosexuals into today’s schools.

When looking at the interracial relationship of Archie and Valerie, or Miles Morales being our new spin-off series Spider-Man, the presence of multiple universes and parallel storylines detracts from the importance of the character development. The growth of Archie and Valerie dating is negated or confused with the fact that Archie married Veronica last year – and then Betty in a different story arc. Miles Morales if established as a new superhero in the present would have the chance to grow into everyday publishing if the role of Spider-Man wasn’t already owned by Peter Parker.

Creating a new character into the comic world does help promote diversity and establish a more accurate representation of the real world. Unfortunately, Marvel Comics seems to be looking for short-term headlines by swapping an already established character with a new racial background.

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Song of the Week - Primitive Radio Gods (from the Archives)

2011-07-29T03:00:00.006-04:00

Primitive Radio Gods - Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in my Hand
Album: Rocket

Perhaps they are the definition of a one-hit wonder for many, but Primitive Radio Gods are still making records well after this 1996 hit. The song went to the top of the charts soon after being featured on the soundtrack to The Cable Guy (the movie that almost ruined Jim Carrey's career). The song's famous chorus borrowed from B.B. King's song "How Blue Can You Get", perhaps the reason why the song launched into popularity. While Primitive Radio Gods were shortly a big name, the following year they were dropped from their record label Columbia, and have been lost in obscurity ever since despite having released four full length albums since 2000 - their most recent album, Out Alive, released last year.

While it is unlikely the group will never see their names on any billboard charts again, perhaps it is comforting to know that they are still around and following their passion. Though they will remain a pop culture question in the future, at least people can go back and listen to this once and still great song.

The Leather Jacket

2011-07-27T15:00:00.001-04:00

Homeless people and I have an on-again/off-again relationship, and I’m not sure why. I donate to local shelters, but like many people I never give them spare change directly. I have had a soft spot on occasion on cold nights bringing them hot chocolate or buying them a sandwich, but I don’t do this frequently. The truth is, ever since I moved to Toronto, homeless people hadn’t taken a liking to me until I wore my NASCAR leather jacket one day. From that day, everything changed it seemed.

When walking past those asking for spare change, I can’t find myself walking by and just ignoring them. Typically I look at them and tell them that I’m sorry I don’t have any change (which is true, I never carry change). Other times, I inform them on a place where they can grab a hot meal, typically a local church lunch program. Despite all this, some of them treated me less than nicely. Once I was walking up Church St. on a crowded sidewalk when I tried to sidestep a homeless pedestrian walking the other way. He jarred my shoulder on purpose, but nonetheless I turned to say “Sorry”. He responded out loud without even looking back “I’m not!”

No big deal, I thought. He was just a guy hard on his luck having a tough day. A few weeks later, I was walking around downtown with a colleague of mine. Most men would say she was an attractive woman (she had some modelling in the past); I on the other hand hadn’t done push-ups in a long time to build up any upper body strength. Walking up Yonge St. from the waterfront, we passed under a bridge with two homeless men chatting with each other. Just as we passed by, one could hear one of the men yell out loud enough for all around to hear: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT LOSER?”

I turned around to give the guy a look in the eye, but not a malicious look like a threat. It was more of a request. “C’mon man,” I tried to convey to him telekinetically with my look, “I’m not that bad looking.” She was married anyways, so I wasn’t trying to impress her, but being called a loser from homeless drunks is never good for one’s self-esteem.

A year later, my father found a birthday gift for me at an auction. In perhaps the most surprising gift of my life, my dad gave me a #18 NASCAR leather jacket signed by legend Bobby Labonte. The gift was even harder to understand as my pop hated racing events, most specifically NASCAR. He knew I watched it on occasion, but I was by no means a true fan. Either way, the jacket was just too ostentatious not to wear. At the very least, I could wear it ironically and people would love it. The only real person against the whole aesthetic look was my sister, a future fashion illustrator and fashion aficionado. So, good brother that I am, I surprised her for lunch at work one day wearing said jacket.

Walking along King St. I asked random pedestrians what they thought. “Sporty” was an often used euphemism, while one lady asked if it was a costume for Halloween. No one loved the jacket outright until I separated from my sister and went to the St. Lawrence Market to buy some groceries. Walking alone on Front St., I got a few good looks, but as I crossed Yonge St., the very same homeless gentleman who insulted me once before got my attention from well across the street.

“HEY!” he yelled out so loud that everyone including myself had to look. He was sitting down in front of his baseball cap full of change. He saw me meet his eyes, stood up, looked across the diagonal of the intersection and pointed at me with both arms full out. “NICE JACKET!”

What could I do but smile? I’m sure he didn’t recognize me from before, but at least I had finally been accepted by the Yonge St. yeller.

It is a nice jacket, but at this point I’m pretty sure only he and I think so.

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Sports fans love God, but do they love church?

2011-07-26T15:00:00.001-04:00

God gets more love at sporting events than He does in church. In an era when our trust in organized religion is at an all-time low, church attendance dropping rapidly, and an ever-growing separation of church and state government, sporting events seem to be the only place God gets any recognition anymore.

It does seem ironic that many football fans would skip out on church Sunday morning, go to the stadium for a few beers at the tailgate party, only to sing God Bless America before kickoff. Perhaps The Simpsons put it best when Reverend Lovejoy is giving a sermon to a miniscule congregation on Super Bowl Sunday. “Well, I’m glad some people could resist the lures of the big game.” At this point a man stands up and yells “OH MY GOD THE GAME, I FORGOT THE GAME!” and runs out of the church. The sign outside the church may say “Where every Sunday is Super Sunday” but the football fans know where their loyalty lies. (Fast forward to 20:40).

Baseball fans also are flocking to the stadium early for Sunday afternoon games, foregoing church but singing – yet again, everyone’s favorite – God Bless America during the 7^th inning stretch. They then get to sit down and scream and heckle at opposing players, in good Christian fashion.

New fans to auto racing, such as NASCAR and Indycar, may be surprised at the presence of a pastor at the event giving a traditional Pre-Race Invocation, praying for the safety of the drivers and the beauty of sport. In an era of tolerance, especially towards religious beliefs, it does seem odd that the biggest spectator sport in the world has prayers solely to a Christian God. That being said, the Invocation can occasionally be extremely entertaining, such as the prayer at the recent NASCAR event in Nashville, Tennessee from Pastor Joe Nelms, something that seemed more fitted for Will Ferrell’s NASCAR comedy movie Talladega Nights. He makes sure to thank God for “my smokin’ hot wife” and ends the prayer in true NASCAR fashion “in Jesus’ name; boogity, boogity, boogity; Amen.” His reason for this unusual Invocation was to “[…] give them something they’ll remember and maybe they’ll go home on a Friday night or a Saturday night and say, ‘Maybe I ought to get up and go to church in the morning.’” He sure succeeded in giving them something to remember.

There is no doubting the strong Christian ties to the history of America. There may also be little doubt that these people truly do love God. Even if you look past the fact that these sports and prayers promote only one religion, it’s still a shame for the church establishment that these sporting events are where these fans do most of their praying, thanking, and praising God.

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KISS vs STYX

2011-07-24T03:00:00.004-04:00

As today marks race day for IndyCar in Edmonton, I look back on some one of the untold stories of the Indy race in Toronto two weeks ago. Racing wouldn’t be racing without the shameless advertisement all over the place. Cars have logos stickered on every square inch, jackets are full of stitched in products, and outside the track there are constant give-aways and contests. At the Toronto Indy, the race day was so hot that the most popular sponsor booths were the ones with free samples of cold drinks. The emptiest booth was a radio station offering tickets for an upcoming KISS concert. This begs the question: Does no one care for KISS anymore?

In an old episode of Family Guy, Peter Griffin is watching “KISS Forum – Rhode Island Public Access’ most popular show about KISS”. During the episode, Dennis DeYoung calls in to say that KISS sucks, to which the show host responds “[…] how about I crank a little Detroit Rock City and play Come Sail Away and we can see how they stack up side by side?”

So that’s what I’m doing here to start off the week. How do they stack up head-to-head? Styx has since parted paths with lead singer Dennis DeYoung only to add the incomparable Lawrence Gowan. KISS have aged along with their fans and perhaps the trademark face paint looks a little silly nowadays, but few bands can reach to such a wide audience. Which one of the two do you rank on top?

KISS - Detroit Rock City (live with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra)

Album: Destroyer / KISS Symphony: Alive IV

Styx - Come Sail Away (live)

Album: The Grand Illusion

Song of the Week -Tegan and Sara

2011-07-22T03:00:00.009-04:00

Tegan and Sara - Where Does the Good Go? (live)
Album: So Jealous

Tegan and Sara Quin are twin sisters that make up this Canadian indie rock group. Since they started touring after graduating from high school, their collection including six albums has increasingly gotten better. The last three albums have been nominated for a Juno Best Alternative Album of the Year, though they have yet to bring home a Juno. This popular song from their 4th album was featured on the very first episode of the CBC sitcom "Being Erica", and seeing as how Erica has dominated much of my week so far, one can see how this song has stuck with me.

Watching Erica

2011-07-19T03:00:00.008-04:00

When watching a TV show, I like to start from the very beginning: Season 1 Episode 1. I don’t like to jump in mid-season, I don’t like to miss episodes, and I don’t like miss any lines of dialogue from chatter in the room. I’m a bit of a snob this way, but I feel that’s the way TV should be enjoyed. This doesn’t mean that every show I watch every show right from the first episode. Many shows I watch casually until I am quickly bored, but only the elite do I watch in their entirety right from the start. A very few select sitcoms have won me over in this regard (Seinfeld, Scrubs, The Office, 30 Rock), and much to my delight a Canadian show found a special place on my DVD rack: Being Erica.

It’s true that the main character, Erica Strange, does not relate to me. I am not female, nor Jewish; I am not desperate for love or struggling with work. Nonetheless, the show with all its quirks (Erica sees a therapist who helps her time-travel to have a 2^nd chance to redo regrets from her past), dialogue featuring many famous quotes from writers, and local Toronto references has made it feel like the show really belongs to this city where I live. My partner’s affinity for the show should also be mentioned – she booked off work one day to go be an extra for the show. Upon her return, we decided that we have to start the show from Season 1, so we went out and bought the DVD to watch together. And that’s where everything went wrong.

The problem with watching a show as a team is that one must accommodate the schedule of the other. I can’t watch an episode on my own when she is scheduled to meet up with friends, nor can she watch ahead while I am away for one of my many sporting events. It is our show – to watch together.

Disc One went smoothly – an episode a day for 5 consecutive days – but when we put in the DVD for Season 1 Disc 2, it all fell apart. Imagine our frustration when the disc, despite what the box art and sticker led us to believe, was in fact of Season 2 Disc 2. All of a sudden we were thrown into Erica’s world with new characters, new story arcs hadn’t known of to go along with an unsatisfying lack of knowledge of how past arcs ended. I shut off the TV right away; we had to go exchange the DVD. My partner, however, wanted simply to watch Being Erica no matter where the story was. I refused to go along with it, and refused to let her know of future episodes as we should experience them together.

The next day, we went to exchange the DVD together, but insisted that they try out Disc Two in the store before we took it home. Same problem! Season 1 Disc 2 is actually from Season 2. It must be a major manufacturer’s defect. Instead of a refund, we opted to get the DVD of Season 2 to go along with our future purchase of Season 1. Up comes my next problem – she wants to watch season 2 without seeing how season 1 ended. I want to refuse, but she can only hold out so long from not watching.

It’s dangerous to have different TV habits from a partner who has the same fixation on a particular show. One can never be sure to be home at every moment the other wants to watch, but one often times cannot hold out from finding out what happens next. What is one to do?

Song of the Week - U2 360°

2011-07-15T17:00:00.003-04:00

U2 - City of Blinding Light (live)
Album: How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb

It's only fair to give the biggest rock band in the world a massive stadium, an alien-like claw contraption for a stage, a song list that could provide 5 hours worth of 'best of' material, and tens of thousands of adoring fans. How could U2 not blow everyone away? The 360° is the highest grossing tour in the history of music, and still going despite an illness to Bono postponing many shows from 2010. This could very well be the last great rock band, one that can sell out stadiums and arenas holding over 65000 people. Not bad for four guys from Ireland.

It's just a baseball.

2011-07-14T18:00:00.006-04:00

Tragedy struck first. A few days later, it was just stupidity.

Baseball fans are already well aware of the fate of Shannon Stone the Texas Rangers fan who fell 20 feet from the stands while reaching out to catch a foul ball being tossed to him by left-fielder Josh Hamilton. The father was just trying to catch the ball as a souvenir for his 6-year old son sitting next to him. The events that occurred after he reached out for the ball have been heard around the sporting world.

Keith Carmickle was looking to catch his 3rd baseball of the Derby.

Despite the events at the ballpark in Arlington a mere week before the All-Star game and Home Run Derby, it seems some fans didn’t learn anything from the news. At the Derby, Keith Carmickle tood barefoot on a table next to a 20-foot drop, in hope of catching a baseball. He slipped, fell over the railing, but was saved by his brother as well other fans holding his 250lb. frame and lifting him back to safety. Afterwards, even Carmichael had to admit of his own lack of judgement and luck in surviving. It is absolutely crazy what people will do for a small souvenir.

These are just baseball They are the same baseballs people throw back onto the field when it’s a home run for the visiting team. The majority of foul balls caught by fans are likely hidden in closets or at the bottom of bins found in the basement. They are not big-ticket items; it’s not as though these balls are worth a lot of money. And when the rare big money ball does fall in the stands, as we saw a week ago with Derek Jeter of the New York Yankees hitting a home run on his historic 3000^th hit, Christian Lopez, just a regular Yankee fan, opted to give the ball to Jeter for nothing in return. Lopez just gave away the baseball the some marketers thought could get upwards of a million dollars if auctioned off. In return, Lopez’ gesture has skyrocketed him into serious marketability in the New York area.

At the end of the day, it’s just a baseball. If a foul ball or home run is coming right at you, then of course you should try to catch it. The idea of jumping, running, or diving for a tiny souvenir is not worth the risk in the grand scheme of things. Fans should get up cheer, sit down and watch, and not get reckless over a baseball.

The Search for the Replacement Carafe

2011-07-13T18:00:00.004-04:00

I never even knew what it was called until it smashed to pieces: a carafe.

My partner uses our coffee machine almost every morning before going to work. It is a vital tool to satisfy her morning caffeine fix. Last week, that all came to an abrupt halt. As she was cleaning our kitchen one evening, crowded with an endless supply of different appliances, I heard a scream coinciding with the sound of glass shattering. I was in the next room over talking to my father on the phone, but the crashing noise brought me over to see if she was okay. Glass was everywhere, but she was unhurt. She was, however, quickly unimpressed that I initially chose to continue on with my conversation instead of hurrying over to her rescue. It wasn’t long before she told me where my duties as a boyfriend lie; it was my job to help her clean everything up and I complied. She was right to be a little upset, so now it was up to me to go the extra mile and find a new carafe for her morning brew. It was the least I could do for her.

Who knew that finding such a simple thing could be so difficult? Initially I decided that Canadian Tire must be the way to go. They had many “Universal” carafes that worked on all sorts of brands and the only sizes were for 12-cup coffee machines, so naturally I figured that must be my size. Naturally it was too tall, too fat to fit in our machine; it turns out we had a 10-cup machine. It was time to return it and try all over again.

After returning the item, problem-free, the next spot on my list was Sears. Oddly enough, they had no replacements for the rare 10-cup coffee pot. They recommended Williams-Sonoma, a place where I’ve had stories in the past. The store was grandiose and beautiful and they had options galore for replacement carafes, but the shapes were so spectacularly different that I really needed to remember my brand name. In an effort to make our kitchen appliances matching in colour, something very important for my partner but not for me, our appliances are all from three distinct brands: KitchenAid, Krups, and Cuisinart. To the educated chef, these brands may mean a whole lot of difference, but to me it just means a whole lot of silver appliances. I made an educated guess that we had a Cuisinart coffee maker, but upon returning home realized I was again wrong. It was Krups. Despite holding the same amount of coffee, this carafe was again too fat. Another solid walk back to the store for the return led me to the unpleasant news that they had no Krups replacements. I was again out of luck.

My lack of research into a product I own was starting to frustrate me. I went to the Krups website and found all the stores in the area that sell replacement parts; two were next to each other less than a half-hour walk away. I called to confirm they had the parts and they answered in the affirmative. Once again, I put on my shoes and got on my way. I got to the first store and talked to salesman only to learn that he thought that I wanted to buy the machine/carafe as the package they typically come in. I had no intention of putting forward another $80 for a second machine and one pot, and he let me know that they actually do not sell the pots individually. I wasn’t too bothered at this news, as the next store was right across the street. I went in to discover that the product they put aside for me was another “Universal” brand, but right there on the back it said it worked on Krups 10-cup carafes. Surely this one would work, right? I bought it, went home, and again found myself disappointed. Though this was the first version I had bought that actually fit inside the coffee maker, this pot lacked a very integral mound on the top of the lid. This mound would elevate a slight knob at the top of the coffee holder, thereby activating the coffee machine. Without this useless mound, the coffee would not even start to drip. This new carafe, my third purchase, was set to be returned once again.

Notice the slight mound in the middle of the lid.

Krups had won: the only way I could get any use out of this coffee maker again was to go to their website and pay whatever price they had for the exact replacement. There was no way around it. I went to the website and found the exact model and put it in my online shopping cart, but there was one final twist. There was no icon allowing me to “go to the checkout”. I could add infinitely to my shopping cart, but there was no place to go ahead and purchase what I needed. I clicked all over the website before eventually settling on calling customer service. The lady on the other end of the line, emulating what I had done, shockingly confirmed my online shopping experience: there was no checkout button. She tried to get a hold of web assistance, but no answer. For all the work put into this website, the single most integral link was missing; there was no place to buy the stuff. Eventually we decided on making the order over the phone instead of online. At this point, after a full day of walking including three product purchases and returns, technically the right carafe is on its way. The only thing left to do now is wait the 5 business days for shipping to see how this carafe isn’t going to work either.

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Song of the Week - Nightclub Edition

2011-07-08T03:00:00.013-04:00

Britney Spears - Till the World Ends

Album: Femme Fatale

I hate going to nightclubs. I just don’t like the whole premise behind it: spend a lot of time getting ready; pay for an expensive cab ride downtown; wait outside until being let in after one hour; $15 cover charge; and then when inside the drinks are overpriced, the dance floor is crowded, and the music is too loud to sustain any conversation. Needless to say, discos are not for me. Even still, after three years of living in Toronto, I figured it was about time I knew the name of just one club here. So, on the way home from a Blue Jays game, I saw one club: TIME. I figured if anyone ever asked me what the best club in Toronto was, I’d just say TIME. Three blocks later on my walk home, two girls all dressed up come up to me and ask:

“Excuse me. Do you know where the nightclub “TIME” is?”

“I do,” I responded. “Just two blocks down on your right.”

They left happy for directions, and I left happy that I could point out the only club I knew. I don’t like dance clubs and I don’t like Britney Spears, but if I ever do get coerced into going to a club, I hope they play this song. It’s actually pretty damn catchy.

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Sure it's bad here, but have you looked at somewhere worse?

2011-07-07T03:00:00.030-04:00

In this week’s Time Magazine, contributing editor-at-large Fareed Zakaria compares the growing U.S. credit crisis with the economic problems of Greece. His conclusion can be found in his sub-heading (of the print version): “The government in Athens faces huge problems. Ours are manageable”.

Using other examples comparing the economies of Canada and the U.S., Globe and Mail columnist Margaret Wente comes to a similar conclusion (also found in the print version's sub-heading), only with this result claiming all is alright in Canada and not the United States. “These days, I always cross the border back to Canada with a feeling of relief. Our problems can be solved, but theirs can’t”.

How fitting is it that within the same week, two prominent journalists come to the same conclusion: Sure, things may be bad here, but it’s much worse somewhere else.

The reality is that every nation has problems, the economy nearly always at the forefront of items to be dealt with by the government. With that, the focus should be on identifying the problems and finding practical solutions to make things at home better. Things will always appear better if you compare them to places that are worse off, but that doesn’t help lead to any real solutions.

To put in differently, the (often offensive) Australian comedian Jim Jeffries likes to tell the story of his high blood pressure reading from his Australian doctor. When he gets the exact same reading from his British doctor, he is told that everything is fine. “Their standards in Australia are too high,” his doctor claims, "what with their salads and sport." So, Jeffries comes to the conclusion: “I’m an unhealthy Australian person, but I’m a healthy British person. I figure, as my health gets worse, I’m gonna move to shittier countries, until eventually I’m the healthiest man in Rwanda.”

If we want to solve problems with health care, the economy, and the multitude of issues we have to deal with in our own country, it does no good to say “Be happy that it’s not as bad as this other country here”. Margaret Wente says Canada’s problems can be solved, but those of the Americans can’t; similarly, Fareed Zakaria is saying the Americans can manage their problems, while the Greeks have the real problems to face. Comparing one’s country to one in lower standing only shows the magnitude of the problems approaching that nation. Even Greek journalists can compare their country to places worse off, but that will only be a diversion from their present-day reality.

Keenan Thompson, from Saturday Night Live, plays a financial consultant named Oscar Rogers in several skits in which he brings forth a step-by-step formula to fixing the economic crisis.

“Identify the problem. FIX IT! Identify another problem. FIX IT. Repeat as necessary until it’s all FIXED.”

All joking aside, this formula is much better than simply asking readers to be happy that we don’t have someone else’s problems.

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David Haye: the reason no one should bother with heavyweight boxing anymore

2011-07-06T03:00:00.033-04:00

We were led to believe it was a superfight for the heavyweight championship of the world, but those who know boxing knew it was one last gasp at the limelight for this generation of boxers. Ever since the retirement of Lennox Lewis in 2004, the heavyweight division has been dominated by two Ukrainian brothers, Wladimir and Vitali Klitschko. Between the two of them, they have faced every contender, every up-and-comer, and otherwise every fighter willing to stand across the ring from them. They have beaten every one of those opponents with ease. Many critics blame the lack of interest in the division at the lack of an American star, the methodical approach in which the two brothers jab their way to victories, and the lack of any rivalries. Heavyweight boxing needed someone to create a spark, and so entered the Brit David “Hayemaker” Haye. The sad truth is that there would never be a more capable fighter of turning off fans from heavyweight boxing for a long time.

David Haye never deserved a title shot against either Klitschko in reality. He beat one very average fighter, Nicolai Valuev, in a controversial split decision to win a meaningless championship belt (boxing has a plethora of these). Haye then threatened to retire with his ‘legacy’ intact if either one of the brothers did not fight him. Haye disgracefully wore t-shirts depicting himself holding their decapitated heads, he called their fighting styles robotic and boring, and claimed he would knock them both out with relative ease.

“I was doing those things,” claimed Haye, “to get attention and get noticed. Me doing those things got me noticed and allowed me to bypass those five or six mandatory nobodies to get a title shot. I had one fight with Monte Barrett, then I was straight in there fighting for the title against Nikolai Valuev.” One meaningless title defence later against a completely unknown opponent, and Haye suddenly had ‘earned’ his mega-fight with Wladimir.

A disgraceful David Haye takes out an ad in Men's Health magazine.

Fans in Hamburg, Germany this past Saturday were treated to David Haye doing everything he could to ruin his own name in boxing circles, as well as the heavyweight division in itself. When his introductory music began, he didn’t show up. The music continued until it eventually stopped, leaving fans wondering if Haye was chickening out at the last second. Haye’s dressing room claimed he wasn’t ready yet. More than twenty minutes of wasted showmanship later, Haye finally started towards the ring. The fight wasn’t much better in terms of quality. While Klitschko tried to be the aggressor, the smaller and quicker Haye continuously ducked and avoided any punching exchanges. When Klitschko did get close, Haye would throw a punch and slip to the canvas claiming he had been pushed down. Haye’s tactic was effective in getting a point deducted from the taller Klitschko for ‘pushing down’ on Haye, but his dirty tactic didn’t fool the referee much longer. In the 11^th round, as Haye had a punch blocked and subsequently went down again to the ground ‒ his ninth time on the floor by my count ‒ the referee, realizing he had been deceived earlier and now growing tired of Haye’s tricks, ruled it a knockdown despite Wladimir not even throwing a punch.

By the end of a lopsided decision, the HBO commentators were already making predictions on what made-up injury Haye would blame for his horrible performance. Haye decided on going with a broken pinkie toe from training several weeks prior for his lack of punching power.

Before the fight even began, recent Boxing Hall of Fame inductee Mike Tyson introduced this fight as the biggest in Heavyweight boxing since Mike Tyson versus Lennox Lewis back in 2002. Even still, the Lewis vs. Tyson fight featured both fighters at least five years past their prime, and ended with Tyson being brutally beaten until, almost mercifully, getting knocked out in the 8^th round. To claim that Tyson/Lewis and the present fight of Haye/Klitschko are the two biggest heavyweight fights in the last decade is a true testament to the lack of quality in heavyweight boxing. Long gone are the glory days of Muhammad Ali, Joe Frazier, and George Foreman.

David Haye, in the meantime, has proven several sad truths about heavyweight boxing today:

1 – Talking trash advances your career a lot faster than fighting in this sport;

2 ‒ continuously claiming you are the best in the world will create a big box office draw and, thus, get you a bigger paycheck;

3 – backing away, slipping to the ground (nine times!), and abstaining from punching your opponent will help you avoid taking any serious damage;

4 ‒ claiming an injury afterwards will help you save face; and

5 ‒ heavyweight boxing is no longer worth anyone’s time or money.

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The word 'Negro'

2011-07-04T12:00:00.006-04:00

Some words are more powerful than others. They carry more weight, more history, and are also not to be used casually. I remember an old soccer teammate of mine who was an exchange student from Denmark. We were sitting on the bench at soccer practice when one of those words came up.

He started off his story with: “Here in Canada, there are a lot of Negro…”

“Let me stop you right there,” I quickly interjected. There were several black guys on our team right next to him, and I figured it better that I educate him on his word choice rather than have someone scold him. “The word ‘Negro’”, I continued, “is something of a taboo here in North America. I know you don’t mean to be rude or offensive, and perhaps the word is common or acceptable in Denmark, but you really shouldn’t use that word here for fear of offending someone.”

“What word should I use?”

“Well, you could say ‘black’. That’s what most people say. But you could also use ‘African-American’ or even ‘African-Canadian’. I guess it really depends on the situation and what people around you prefer. So, I’m sorry that I cut you off earlier. What were you going to say?”

“Okay,” he started slowly, “I was just going to say that, here in Canada, there are a lot of African-Canadian squirrels.”

Everybody on the bench started to laugh. How could we not?

“You know,” I told him, “in that case, we just use the word ‘black’.”

While this was a harmless anecdote of a foreigner learning about the acceptable uses of words rooted in black history, it is unfortunate that the very same word can be used in the most appropriate of terms and be scolded outright. This is what transpired recently between award-winning author Lawrence Hill and a Dutch political group intent on burning his book, The Book of Negroes.

Several weeks ago, acclaimed Canadian author Lawrence Hill (The Book of Negroes, Any Known Blood) published in the Toronto Star his reply to a letter he received from Roy Groenberg, the Chairman from a Dutch political group called the “Foundation to Honour and Restore payments to Victims of Slavery in Suriname”. There, Mr. Groenberg wrote:

“We, descendants of enslaved in the former Dutch colony Suriname, want to let you know that we do not accept a book with the title The Book of Negroes. We struggle for a long time to let the word ‘nigger’ disappear from the Dutch language and now you set up your Book of Negroes! A real shame! That’s why we make the decision to burn this book on the 22nd of June 2011. Maybe you do not know, but June is the month before the 1st of July, the day that we remember the abolition from the Dutch, who put our ancestors in slavery.”

Lawrence Hill makes a passionate response to this act of intimidation, speaking of how the word ‘Negro’ is used in a historical sense and no word will ever be perfectly acceptable:

Racial terminology will always fail, because it is absurd to try to define a person by race. In North America we have witnessed a kaleidoscopic evolution of racial terminology over the last 50 years.

When my own father, Daniel Hill, was appointed a chair of the Ontario Human Rights Commission in 1973, the Globe and Mail ran a headline saying “Commission appoints Negro chair”. He was born in 1923 and proudly called himself a Negro for most of his life, but you can be sure that he would not be using the term today, if he were alive.

And our own grandchildren are sure to laugh at the terms currently in use, such as Black and African Canadian. When they are running the country, they’ll bring their own terms into play. I like to imagine what people will be saying, instead of “Negro”, “Black” or “African-Canadian”, in 50 years.

In fact, in Lawrence Hill’s novel Any Known Blood ‒ a story about 5 generations of a black family living between Oakville, Ontario and Baltimore, Maryland ‒ in the present day, an old Aberdeen Williams refers to himself as a Negro before correcting himself on describing himself with that word. He claims that the politically correct term has changed so often during his lifetime that it is tough for an old man like him to keep up.

In our present day, the Dutch-based group burned copies of the book’s cover, instead of burning the book in its entirety. This seems only fitting because the cover is likely the only part of the book they read. If they were to read the story, they would be amazed at the perseverance of a young African woman who was kidnapped and shipped off into the American slave trade, where she educated herself over the course of her amazing life and one day pens her name, as well as the names of many black men and women, into the ‘Book of Negroes’ ‒ a historical document for the migration into Canada of Black Loyalists who served the British during the American Revolution. Lawrence Hill's title for this novel, The Book of Negroes, is taken directly from the original historical book; it is not made to be offensive, but rather a look into a major document of African-Canadian history.

There is no doubt amongst people today that the word ‘Negro’, as well as many other terms for one’s race, is offensive in many instances; however, we must think twice before censoring the use of any particular word. We cannot let others dictate the use of these words by being short-sighted in burning the cover of a book that, ironically for those who chose to burn the cover, looks back on the struggles of black history. Instead, as Mr. Hill says, “One must simply know the heft of each word, and use it appropriately.” He couldn’t have said it any better.

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Additional reading on this story:

Lawrence Hill's Special to The Star,

The New Yorker,

CBC Q&A with Lawrence Hill about the book.

Are we cheering for women's soccer or are we just cheering for Canada?

2011-07-03T03:00:00.008-04:00

It’s not the best soccer in the world, that much is clear, so the question remains as to whether the Women’s World Cup is worth watching. Canada’s team has had a disappointing run in this year; their most recent 4-0 loss at the hands of France had them go without a single shot on goal, eliminating them from advancing past the group stages. There was so much hype for the Canadian women, plenty of television coverage, and newspapers practically begging sports fans and non-sports fans alike to watch Canada play. With one final game to go, and Canada providing the fans the furthest thing from quality soccer, the question will ultimately repeat itself: is this worth watching?


Christine Sinclaire scores in a 2-1 loss against Germany.

Women’s tennis stars would not be able to compete with men on the big stage, but they are still as popular as their male counterparts, drawing huge crowds and television audiences. Women’s basketball, on the other hand, despite having a professional league (WNBA) has struggled to bring in fans or viewers on TV. So where will women’s soccer find itself?

Camille Abily (10) scores in France's rout over Canada

The quality of women’s soccer cannot compete with men’s. The sport is noticeably slower, a reality of women not being able to run as fast as men, or kick as hard. Canada’s female national team could not get a shot on goal against France, so it’s not hard to imagine that Canada would struggle to earn even an attempt on goal against the professional men of Toronto FC, a bottom ranking MLS team. Toronto FC, for their part, would struggle to get a shot on goal against the top men’s teams in European soccer. It goes to the show the vast difference of quality between the two genders.

Women’s soccer does lack quality at times, but soccer fans (and sports fans alike) have proven willing to support men’s teams that are not the best in the world. Some soccer fans in Toronto may avoid watching Toronto FC and the MLS in its entirety, stating that European soccer is of higher quality, but these people are quickly becoming the minority. Stadiums for the German Bundesliga are all selling out and those fans know that their teams are not as good as those in Spain or England. Hoards of fans come out to those games in Germany, Turkey, Scotland, and everywhere in Europe, Asia, Africa, and South America not because it’s the best soccer in the world, not because the best soccer isn’t accessible on TV, but because it is the home team.

With Canada eliminated, however, the only thing left worth watching is the quality of the soccer from the other nations. During the men’s World Cup, it didn’t matter that Canada never qualifies (outside of a goal-less appearance in 1986), Canadians were still going crazy for soccer. That won’t be happening this time around. Women’s soccer is not being watched for the love of the game, but rather for supporting the home team. Women’s hockey only has such a fan base in Canada because we continuously win by large margins; however, once you put in any other two nations against each other, no one could care less. The same goes for the Women’s World Cup: I can’t imagine great TV ratings in Canada if the final were to be Germany versus Brazil. We aren’t excited to watch women’s soccer; we are excited to watch Canada.

We hyped up our women’s soccer team and this led to an even bigger let down. The women are very talented, but the pace of the game and competitive balance between nations is far greater than anything men’s soccer offers. This leaves for a lot of room for improvement to earn the love of everyday soccer fans. Women’s soccer might still be worth watching for some; just don’t expect the amazing to happen, not yet at least.

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Song of the Week: Bonus Track - Greg Brown

2011-06-26T03:00:00.006-04:00

Greg Brown - The Poet Game
Album: The Poet Game

After posting a fantastic new folk song from Greg Trooper this past Friday with the Song of the Week, I found it only fitting to add another classic folk song for the weekend.

Singer-songwriter Greg Brown, from Fairfield, Iowa, has also had a long and distinguished career in music including over two dozen albums. Back in 1994, his album The Poet Game won him his second Indie award from NAIRD (National Association for Independent Record Distributors) and he has won a slew of independent music awards since. His latest album, Freak Flag, was released earlier this year.

Song of the Week - Greg Trooper

2011-06-24T03:00:00.009-04:00

Greg Trooper - They Call Me Hank
Album: Upside-Down Town

After a long and busy week, nothing is more relaxing soft guitar and soothing lyrics. Earlier this year, folk lovers were treated to New Jersey native Greg Trooper releasing his tenth album, Upside-Down Town. Trooper has found himself living living in Texas, Kansas, New York, and Nashville since leaving high school, and one can feel the long road of travelling in his voice. Inspired by legends Bob Dylan and Hank Williams, Trooper has that same storytelling power in his lyrics, making one stop in their tracks and really listen.

Toronto Sports Deserve to be Dead Last

2011-06-23T03:00:00.013-04:00

Toronto is a great city for those who love sports. It is not, however, a good city for those who love winning teams. According to ESPN and their annual Ultimate Team Rankings, Toronto was ranked as the worst city for professional sports in North America. Clearly, this ticked off a few hardcore Toronto sports fans, as well as sports figures. Most notably, our Toronto Maple Leafs manager, Brian Burke, let the public know quickly what he thinks about his Leafs ranking 3^rd last across all North American sports franchises: “I don’t think ESPN knows squat about Canada. I don’t think they know squat about hockey.”

Cathal Kelly, a columnist with the Toronto Star, also quickly jumped to the defence of the city, citing how other cities fail to impress in other categories not included in the ranking system, such as the apathy of the sold-out Miami Heat games, or the surliness of the Philadelphia Phillies faithful. Defend the city, the teams, and the country all you want, but any Toronto sports fan cannot deny that Toronto sports fans are getting ripped off. Maple Leafs games will always sell out and fans wanting season tickets for Toronto FC will be on a waiting list ‒ no one is debating the loyalty of some fans ‒ but the public is consistently being treated to some of the worst sports organizations across practically every sport. Like it or not, Toronto deserves to be dead last.

The beloved Toronto Maple Leafs (ranked 120 of the 122 North American Sports Franchises) have perhaps the largest and most loyal fan base in hockey, but most of those fans will have to spend half their paycheck in order to get seats. And what is the reward for the young Leafs fan paying for the most expensive hockey tickets in the NHL? They get to witness a team that has lost more home games than they have won in the past four straight seasons. Even the loyal season ticket holder of the NHL’s highest paid team has not seen a playoff game since 2004. How’s that for futility?

Toronto's franchise player

In the very same arena as the Leafs, the Air Canada Centre, the NBA's Toronto Raptors (ranked 116 of 122) have not fared much better. Since their inception in 1995, the Raptors have won only one playoff series, a feat accomplished way back in 2001. The fans, who have not seen the playoffs for the past three seasons (and counting), get to put their hard-earned dollars towards watching our star player, Andrea Bargnani. Most people outside of Toronto (or his home country of Italy) have likely never heard of this former #1 overall pick.

Toronto FC, the first Canadian team in Major League Soccer, have shed their “new” label and now found themselves as one of the worst teams in the league. This season, they seem to be “regrouping” or “retooling” or any other synonym for a poor team; the fact remains that they have never made the playoffs since the team joined the MLS back in 2007. Thank goodness the ESPN Index doesn’t include MLS as of yet.

Toronto’s adopted NFL team, the Buffalo Bills (ranked 107 of 122), has had the chance to play one regular season game in the SkyDome for the past three seasons. They have lost all three times. This should not be all too surprising, as the Bills have not made the playoffs this century. Seriously. Luckily for the hardcore NFL fan in Toronto, the Bills are 2-0 in preseason games.

The Toronto Blue Jays (ranked 63 of 122) are the top franchise in Toronto, but you would never know it by the stadium that consistently sells under a third of the maximum capacity. The tickets are reasonably priced and the team has drawing power ‒ they led the Major Leagues in Home Runs last year and have the best hitter in baseball, Jose Bautista ‒ but the fans still haven’t been convinced to come out in large numbers. Perhaps that’s in part due to the fact that the Jays haven’t made the playoffs since their historic back-to-back World Series victories in 1992-1993. Still, in terms of what the tickets cost compared to what the team produces on the field, the Jays rank higher than juggernauts Boston Red Sox and New York Yankees on the ESPN scale. Toronto fans should really be giving this team more love.

Being told we’re the worst sports city is not fun to hear, but the facts don’t lie. Toronto franchises are not: investing in good players (Leafs), drafting strong young talent (Raptors), or making meaningful playoff runs (Blue Jays). Instead of complaining about ESPN’s skewed ranking system, we as fans should demand a better product for our money. That, or Toronto should encourage ESPN to add professional lacrosse to next year’s rankings: the Toronto Rock were last year’s NLL Champions and no one seems to be talking about that.

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The Comic Universe: Where Obituaries Are Irrelevant

2011-06-22T03:00:00.009-04:00

When I was eight years old, Superman died. I remember it well, as my older brother had his paper route go by the comic book shop every day, and we were well versed in the news events of the comic universe. We bought two copies of the famous story “The Life and Death of Superman”, sealed in an all-white package with the famous “S” Superman logo on the front; one copy was for reading, the other copy was to keep in perfect condition to resell in the future. Superman dying was the event of the century, or so we thought. Then we realized something: no one is dead forever, at least not in the comic world.

Before Christmas of the very same year, Superman had been revived in a regeneration matrix of sorts. He was dead for less than a year because comics couldn’t exist without him. Since that successful story arc in 1993, we’ve had countless comic superhero “deaths” in an effort by publisher to boost attention and, thus, sales. I guess it was only a matter of time until Spider-Man died, a fate found this week in Ultimate Spider-Man.

I’ve seen Batman die, only to find out later on that it was a Batman clone that was killed; the real Batman was sent to the past, alive and well. Wonderwoman has died too, only to be resurrected. The Green Lantern has done quite well for himself, accomplishing the revival trifecta in his lengthy career including three deaths: his soul found its way back to the body, he survived a most certain death only to escape from hell, and he was revived by another. It is quite the accomplishment cheating death in such a variety of ways.

The sad thing about comic book deaths is that we, as fans, have no reason to give them any more attention than before. Our neighbourhood friendly Spider-Man won’t have to worry about any resurrection in this case, as his death takes place in the “Ultimate Universe", which is completely separated from the primary Marvel universe. In effect, his death doesn’t count for the storytellers of the comic Amazing Spider-Man or any other story outside of the Ultimate comics series. Instead of worrying if Spider-Man will come back, fans can simply open up any of the other dozen comics featuring him on the cover. And it’s only June; he’ll probably be back alive in the Ultimate Universe just in time for Christmas.

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Song of the Week - Coconut Records

2011-06-17T03:00:00.049-04:00

Coconut Records - Microphone
Album: Davy

I want to be Jason Schwartzman's best friend. The man is beyond hilarious, beyond talented. Anyone debating his sense of humour need look no further than his New Yorker promo for the iPad. His success in film is solidified merely by being a staple actor in almost every Wes Anderson movie, and he has found a new niche on televsion starring in the HBO show Bored to Death, now entering its 2nd season and also featuring Ted Danson and Zach Galifianakis.

Acting clearly isn't Schwartzman's only forte. His solo musical project, in the form of Coconut Records, already has two full length albums. His first album, Nighttiming, found several of his songs in major motion pictures such as Spider-Man 3, Funny People, and Cloverfield. His songs have appeared in numurous television shows, and Schwartzmen even produced the theme song for his aforementioned HBO show Bored to Death. If you just find him doing anything, odds are you will be more than impressed. Go buy his CDs, go watch his movies. If I talk him up enough, maybe he'll become my friend.

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No high road in sight for Lebron or his “Haters”

2011-06-16T03:00:00.014-04:00

At a time when we should be celebrating the true team victory of the Dallas Mavericks in the NBA Finals, it seems more appropriate for those who hate the Miami Heat to avoid the high road and take as many jabs at Lebron James’ loss as possible. James is not faring much better for the sports public, insulting all the ‘haters’ by belittling them with their personal problems that will not go away despite the Heat losing and saying that his life will remain the same.

Lebron: Reminding you that he's rich and you're not.

"All the people that was rooting on me to fail, at the end of the day they have to wake up tomorrow and have the same life that they had before they woke up today.”

“They have the same personal problems they had today. I'm going to continue to live the way I want to live and continue to do the things that I want to do with me and my family and be happy with that. They can get a few days or a few months or whatever the case may be on being happy about not only myself, but the Miami Heat not accomplishing their goal, but they have to get back to the real world at some point."

Many were rightly outraged at James’ comments after his loss and his sore loser attitude. And thus, the floodgates were opened once more allowing sports fans worldwide to openly hate on Lebron once more.

On The Colbert Report, TV comic Stephen Colbert went on analyse Lebron James’ past season of self-hype with perfectly executed sarcasm. On Lebron most recent comments, Colbert said, “It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you disparage the pathetic lives of the little people who make it possible for you to have a career bouncing an inflatable ball.”

Now that James has to go at least another year in search of his first NBA Championship, and noting his especially poor performances in the 4^th quarter of the Finals, other organizations are taking their shots at James to another level. According to ESPNChicago, the Peoria Chiefs ‒ the single-A baseball affiliate of the Chicago Cubs ‒ are organizing a "LeBron James NBA Championship Replica Giveaway night". The team’s president, Rocky Voncachen, is even looking into whether the league will allow them to skip the 4^th inning: “[I]f LeBron doesn't need to show up for the fourth, maybe we won't, either." Making fun of Lebron has gone to new heights.

There’s no high road surrounding the saga of Lebron James in Miami. While Lebron will continue to reap his mega-millions while insulting the general public, the very same public will enjoy booing him at every opportunity and making fun of his shortcomings on the basketball court. His ‘haters’ will continue to let him know how he’ll never be as good as Michael Jordan, or even teammate Dwayne Wade, but the focus is lost on the winners of the NBA Finals. I guess it makes sense: only one city cheers for the Dallas Mavericks while every city in America will go out of its way to boo the Miami Heat. All the while, Lebron is providing enough fuel to let this fire burn for a long time to come.

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NBA Championship: Not for Sale

2011-06-15T03:00:00.019-04:00

Can you buy an NBA Championship? The Dallas Mavericks won the NBA Finals this past weekend, beating the Miami Heat. The Mavericks are a team in the true sense of the word: they had their superstar, Dirk Nowitzki , but the rest of the team has been tinkered with over the past decade, adding role players here and there, growing together, until finally the ultimate goal was achieved. The Miami Heat tried to gain success another way: they paid the three top free agents the maximum salary and paid the remaining roster the minimum amount in order to stay under the salary cap. The thought was that many older veterans chasing an elusive championship would be willing to take the pay cut in order to win a certain championship with the three elite players Dwayne Wade, Lebron James, and Chris Bosh (known as the Big 3). This past Sunday, every basketball fan outside of the state of Florida rejoiced at the Mavs’ victory.

Lebron is still searching for his 1st NBA Championship

Hating the Miami Heat is not a difficult task; in fact, there’s probably something wrong with you if you don’t. Fans of Cleveland and Toronto have more reason to hate Miami, who lured away James and Bosh (respectively) to the warmth of Miami. Nobody likes those trying to win Championships the easy way buy making an all-star team, but the Heat made the whole player signings primetime television. How could one not cheer against them?

The tactic of hoarding superstars is not something new. The Boston Celtics won the 2008 NBA Finals after gathering superstars Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett to join bad team with one superstar, Paul Pierce. The Heat’s strategy seemed very similar, except that the Big 3 figured a Championship was a sure-thing. The victory parade began before the players even had their first practice. Other teams followed the same strategy of gathering huge talents with low-paid supporting players. The New York Knicks attracted Amare Stoudamire and Carmelo Anthony, with little success as they were eliminated early in the playoffs.

A grandiose press conference to announce the Big 3 signing

Basketball was slowly turning into the one sport where it was easy for a team to go from a worst-to-first record in consecutive seasons, so long as the ownership was willing to pay. Cities like Miami, Boston, and New York are huge draws for mega-athletes wanting to live in major city, leaving teams like Cleveland, Minnesota, and New Jersey with little chance of wooing athletes to the city.

The Big 3 have played only one year together, and it is likely they will have many more chances at winning throughout their 7-year contracts, but at least this weekend, the NBA Championship could not be bought. Lebron James, once thought to be the next Michael Jordan, is losing all his credibility of being the sports all-time best, especially when he now has zero Championship rings and is not proving to be even the best on his team. Nothing is going as planned, much to the delight of the basketball fans worldwide. The Dallas Mavericks proved to the world that a TEAM is what is needed to win. Many say that it is inevitable that Miami will win with their talent, and perhaps they are right, but at least all is right in the NBA world this week.

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Oh Quebec, always singing.

2011-06-14T03:00:00.001-04:00

Quebec has a new independent national anthem. Yet again. In what seems to be a steady stream of keeping the hopes of sovereignty alive, “O Kebek” is the latest call for independence from songwriter Raoul Duguay. Despite the media attention this story might get, especially across Quebec, the anthem is full of shortcomings in separating the vision of Quebec from Canada.

"O Kebek", Quebec's new anthem?

To begin with, this new inspiration for sovereignty foregoes that fact that the title name, “O Kebek”, is ridiculously similar to “O Canada”, the very same country Quebec sovereigntists wish to secede from. The song also ignores the decline of Quebec’s sovereignty party, the Bloc Quebecois, which now has merely four seats in Canada’s parliament. Finally, yet another new nominee for Quebec’s national anthem deafens the previous 5 attempts in the last 50 years, without any full support of independence coming from the people.

Though Canada gained independence from the United Kingdom in 1867, “O Canada” wasn’t even first sung until 1880. And it wasn’t until 100 years after “O Canada” was first performed that it officially became the national anthem in 1980. Surely, this national anthem was not the spark or call-to-arms that pulled Canada away from the British. When speaking of the anthem’s history, the music was written by Calixa Lavalée, a French-Canadian, and commissioned by Quebec’s lieutenant-governor, Theodore Robitaille. Canada’s anthem is already full of French-Canadian history

Montreal Canadians, the perfect union of Quebec and Canada

Quebec’s fight for sovereignty is now waning at the democratic level. After the 1995 referendum results were (barely) in favour of Quebec remaining part of Canada and now the recent 2011 election results giving the Bloc Quebecois party virtually no voice in Parliament, the idea of Quebecois rallying around a new anthem is not the right path for those who need to reintegrate themselves as part of a collective Canadian identity. A new Quebec anthem is an idea that has been exhausted to death, and the chances of it catching on are just as likely as Quebec most beloved hockey team, the Montreal Canadians, to change their name to the Montréal Quebecois. The time has come for Quebec to truly find its voice within the whole of Canada, instead of singing behind closed doors.

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The EdgeWalk: A Thrill for Some, Too Much for Others

2011-06-13T03:00:00.005-04:00

Starting this August, Toronto’s CN Tower, once proud owner of the title “World’s Tallest Freestanding Building”, will be adding a new feature to the tower: the EdgeWalk. Quite simply, it is a 20-30 minute hands-free walk around of the tower at 356 metres above the city. These walkers will find themselves just above the restaurant at the top, strapped into the building while wearing a special outfit harnessing them to the building. From there, they are free to lean forward and look down at the city below, all without any glass or screen blocking their view. In other words, it’s terrifying.

When I first told a friend of mine about the EdgeWalk, she replied quite simply: “That sounds like a bad idea.” Surely safety must be at the primary concern of most people, but the safety standards have apparently surpassed expectations according to the official website. Others might determine that the $175 price tag is a bit too much for the thrill. I would argue that what good is money if not for a grand and unforgettable experience.

The CN tower is a beautiful tower marking the core of Toronto’s downtown, but for locals and tourists alike, it has lost some of its lustre after 35 years. The colours at night light up the downtown for those looking from afar, and the glass floor from within is plenty scary for those who dare to walk on it (especially when fearless young kids are jumping up and down on it). This EdgeWalk, however, brings it all to the next level. Finally, locals have reason to consider going to the top again. Others might find the thrill of the EdgeWalk greater than anything a rollercoaster can provide. Personally, I will be saving up some extra dollars for the occasion, and trying to convince my friends to do the same.

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The Genderless Media Storm

2011-05-31T12:01:00.000-04:00

Since being reported by Jayme Poisson in the Toronto Star over a week ago, the gender discussion of Storm has drawn both praise and criticism from the public. The discussion revolves around the choice of Storm’s parents to not disclose the sex of the child to anyone outside the immediate family. That’s right, outside of Storm’s mother, father, two brothers, and the doctors and nurses who helped deliver the child, no one knows whether Storm is a girl or boy. Some commentators found this to be a progressive parenting choice by not letting the child’s gender determine the course of their life from birth. Other critics argue that the parents are experimenting with their child’s social behaviour and this could have a detrimental effect in the future. I tend to agree with the commentators arguing for the rights of the parents to continue with their chosen path.

Though Storm is now just a child, make no mistake, once older he/she will have no problems identifying his/her sex: you need only look between the legs. Moving into puberty, Storm will eventually grow facial hair if male, or breasts if female. Physically, Storm will not be different in any way due to a different upbringing. As a baby though, what does it matter if family friends do not know whether to buy Storm baby gifts of Bob the Builder or Dora the Explorer? Boys are allowed to play with Barbie without fear that it will entirely change their upbringing; girls can have just as much fun with toy cars as boys; pink and purple are not colours designed exclusively for one gender.

Toronto Star columnist Catherine Porter recently wrote a piece stating the cons of Storm’s parents’ decision. There Porter claims, “Without boundaries, I wonder if little 4-month-old Storm will wander aimlessly, like so many of my thirty-something friends.” Such an argument is devoid from logic: one must assume that these ‘lost’ friends in their 30s knew their gender from birth and they are nonetheless “wandering aimlessly”, so why would being “genderless” as a child lead Storm to the same fate? A later article allowed Porter to give her real point-of-view (instead of the being placed on the con side of the pro-con debate) and mentioned that she applauds the parents and believes “Storm will turn out just fine, like most kids do.”

Storm with older brother, Jazz.

Storm will grow up knowing that he/she is allowed to play wear any type of clothing, watch any TV show, and play with any sorts of toys without feeling that such a thing is frowned upon due to social conventions. If Storm is a girl wants to go to the next-generation Backstreet Boys concert, or is a boy wanting play videogames with buddies every weekend, something in line with societal conventions, I’m sure that Storm’s parents would still be just as happy with those choices. And if Storm doesn’t like boy bands or videogames, why should that matter in the slightest?

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Song of the Week - Gordon Lightfoot

2011-05-27T03:00:00.001-04:00

Gordon Lightfoot - The Wreck of Edmund Fitzgerald
Album: Summertime Dream

The popularity of Gordon Lightfoot is almost untouchable north of the border. This past week, the Orillia, Ontario native brought a full crowd to Massey Hall four nights in a row. Besides the 16 Juno's and multiple Grammy nominations, Lightfoot is also a Companion of the Order of Canada - Canada's highest civilian honour - and a member of Canada's Walk of Fame. Now at the age of 72, Gordon Lightfoot has proven that his music will forever be engraved in the history of Canadian music.

Female Athletics Gets Stripped Down

2011-05-25T03:00:00.015-04:00

For women to garner attention in professional sports today, pure action and athleticism are not nearly enough to satisfy the average sporting fan. Remember, the average sporting fan is passionate about recruiting the very best players for the home team, but is also very superficial when it comes to women; at least that are what Lingerie Football League founder and CEO Mitchell Mortaza would have you believe. That’s why the Lingerie Football League (LFL) is "blending action, impact and beauty”, with emphasis on ‘beauty’ one must assume. The prospect of women dressing down to scamper around the football field is the whole selling point behind the LFL, “True Fantasy Football”.

As the Toronto Triumph are scheduled to be one of the newest expansion teams to the LFL, and the first one north of the border, it should only make sense that people are starting to talk about women in sport, and what it takes for both the sport and the female athletes to succeed. The WNBA (women’s basketball) is not gathering a massive fan base, the women’s World Cup of soccer is an afterthought when considering how many men’s leagues exist globally, and softball could never compete with the fan support for baseball. As pure female athletics haven't produced a marketable product for the sports consumer, it was only a matter of time before women’s sports were stripped down to the bare essentials.

Though men may gawk at the curves of these women, we must not take away from the athleticism of these female athletes of the LFL. Being beautiful or wearing lingerie does not take away from one’s athletic ability. The two are never mutually exclusive. More importantly for the league, however, is that the players are marketable. The LFL uses its media attention to give these women exposure for something outside the sporting realm. In fact, the LFL does not even pay these players; the league covers only their travel costs. The women are subjecting themselves to serious injuries, without even making any money while putting themselves at high risk, in hopes that their aesthetics will forward their careers outside of sport.

Franck Ribery (left) and Wayne Rooney (right): great athletes, not sex symbols

Many of the women are willing to jump into this sport not merely because of the competition, but rather because the exposure from the sport is seen as something mutually beneficial. While the league is expanding in teams, growing in popularity, and making money, the women have also used the league as a platform to create some exposure of their own and perhaps have that lead to future modeling careers. Last year, Playboy featured eight LFL players in one of their issues; I don’t believe their football statistics had any impact on who was chosen. Going nude is the natural progression for lingerie athletes; there’s even a “nudity clause” in their contract protecting the league should any "wardrobe malfunction" occur during the natural action of tackling in the sport of football.

The unfortunate truth is that the LFL does nothing to forward either the popularity of the sport, nor the advancement of women. Forcing women to play in lingerie as the means to create a fan base or viewership makes the whole event a spectacle, seemingly designed purely for the entertainment of the leery male viewer. No person will become an NFL or CFL fan thanks to the exposure of learning the sport through the LFL. Equally, no real football fan will accept the LFL as any type of substitute. The end result is shameless self-promotion through a product purely designed for the voyeuristic superficial male. The women are being used to create a brand, all for the off-chance hope that someone fancies their look enough to put it on a magazine cover. I do not doubt that the sport will continue to draw out fans, but the athletes should really think twice before putting on the uniform and stepping out on the field in front of throngs of panting and whistling men. Is this really the best way to promote beauty, healthy living, or even athletics?

aa.

Monday Morning, Still no Warning

2011-05-23T03:00:00.005-04:00

The morning after Stephen Harper historic win of a majority government in Canada, coincidentally, I left for a 3-week European vacation. While those from the centre and left-wing parties feared the worst, I knew that, even though I hadn’t voted for him, a Harper majority wouldn’t necessarily mean the end of the world.

Imagine my surprise when I showed up at the airport in Toronto on the 19th, picked up a Canadian newspaper, and read about how Judgement Day is upon us: May 21^st, 2011. Though this had nothing to do with the Conservative political victory, it definitely gave the unsettling feeling that the media was now onto some new stories.

Several weeks ago, I wrote about how the Canadian news media was exclusively giving all of its coverage to the election, hockey playoffs, and royal wedding. Those three topics had monopolized the entire media landscape, and I was looking forward to a time when the media would get back to some more thought-provoking stories, as monarch weddings and hockey I did not feel deserved the amount of coverage they were earning. When I look back on what was making news this past week, I long for the days of the extravagant wedding news cycle.

Doomsday prophet Harold Camping

Now that it’s Monday, and it’s been well almost 48 hours since the predicted Rapture, it’s safe to say that Harold Camping from Family Radio is crazy. Granted, we knew that all along. Camping does get the rare distinction of predicting judgement day wrong on two occasions: his first kick at the can was back in 1994.

So why do we does the media give this silly message a platform? Well, for starters, there’s money. Family Radio did put up millions of dollars in advertising for this doomsday event, and it only makes sense that the media covers the story of this grandeur. More so, the story was kept alive ironically; people knew the world wasn’t ending, but it seemed like a good excuse to throw a party or talk about the miniscule chances of natural disasters. Even David Letterman had his Top Ten things to do before Judgement Day, and joked about how people should try to get back their money for concert tickets in June.

I have now lived through a potential Armageddon on two occasions: Y2K and our most recent May 21^st Judgement Day. I’m sure there were likely many more predictions that I wasn’t even aware of. The truth is that many people, much older than I, have lived through things far more serious than a desperate cry for repentance from radio personalities: World War I, WWII, and the Cuban Missile Crisis. All of these events created a genuine sense of fear that can’t be recreated by delusions of one evangelical.

The sad part is that many naïve people were genuinely worried about the end of days this past Saturday. Many chose to repent, give away their belongings, quit their jobs, or fulfill one last desire before impendent doom. Children who stumbled upon this story may genuinely have feared for their lives. Nothing positive could be accomplished, in all truth. People listened to Camping's vague mathematical theorums, instead of simply reading the Bible.

I realize the irony in writing about a story I feel deserves little credence in the media. Though, perhaps it deserves more attention to bring out the real message for those who were deceived: it didn’t happen this time, it didn’t happen the time last time, and it didn’t happen the time before that. It won't happen next time either -- next time; December 21, 2012 is currently the popular pick thanks to the Mayan calender and Nostrodamus. This boy, Harold Camping, has cried wolf multiple times too many already, and others will follow him. Our response must be to just chuckle and just move on. And for all those people who lost everything: relax, it’s not the end of the world.

aa.

Song of the Week - Rush

2011-05-20T03:00:00.000-04:00

Rush - Limelight
Album: Moving Pictures

Finding great songs are easy when you look back at the history of Rush. The Canadian band, which formed in 1968, has won almost every award possible, and now find themselves on the Canadian Walk of Fame as well as the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Though their popularity has never dwindled, Rush got another dose of promotion from the recent film I Love You, Man, where two friends bond over their love of Rush. Some bands just have what it takes to stand the test of time.